Sunday, March 1, 2009

Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit


"Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit," I mumble, my head still under the covers, trying this silly superstition as my first words on the first day of a new month. Clenching fervently I give forth a silent prayer for courage, understanding and growth.

This grand experiement I've been on, to live my life from my heart, has been difficult, extremely difficult. But you know something...? This has exercised my heart and I feel somehow confident that I've become stronger with a greater capacity to feel wonderfully good emotions and give more of myself to others.

It is hard.

Certainly there have been many times where such openness has caused pain. Sadly, this pain has not always been mine and I've seemed to hurt others. For that I am deeply sorry and if I have caused pain in anyone, please know it was the farthest from my intention of giving my heart in loving kindness.

Sadly we do not live enough from our hearts. It seems like it is improper and in some measure actually forbidden. We need a strong mind to overcome our emotions we are told. Have to brace yourself against letting anyone in too close. Need to avoid that pain even before it could have any remote chance of ever swallowing us.

Well I have resolved to live my life from my heart as much as I possibly can. I will always try to be responsible for my feelings and never let anyone or any experience close my heart. I believe with Truth that we are supposed to live this way.

I pray for courage to continue on this path and pray for the confidence to know that my coming experiences will unfold with deeper meaning and with more beauty than whatever has come before them.

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